for fun Today's WSJ

[David Farber <farber@central.cis.upenn.edu>]

   from a IP reader


  Today's WSJ had one of those year-end, tongue-in-cheek, faux-headline
             that we "could be seeing" in 1994.


     Among the best:


     NORTH KOREA ATTACKS SOUTH KOREA WITH CRUISE MISSILES
          - Warren Christopher Urges Caution


     COLIN POWELL ANNOUNCES GOP CANDIDACY


     GERGEN LEAVES WHITE HOUSE POST TO JOIN POWELL CAMPAIGN
          - 'I was never actually a Democrat either'  Declares White House
     Staffer


     OZONE HOLE WIDENS
          -Christopher Urges Caution


     STEPHANOPOLUS, STREISAND TO WED


     CLINTON HEALTH PLAN CLEARS SENATE
          - A.M.A. Announces Move to Mexico City


     CRAY, APPLE ANNOUNCE MERGER
          -Crapple to Make Really Smart P.C.'s


     DISGRUNTLED POSTMASTER GENERAL OPEN FIRE DURING BOARD MEETING
          -Was Apparently Upset By complaints About New 45-Digit Zip Code


     NIKKEI REBOUNDS
          - But Poll Shows That 97% of Americans Still Think It Is A
     Running Shoe


     PEROT COMPLAINS NO ONE CARES ABOUT HIS VIEWS
     - Offers $5 To Viewers Who Call In To His TV Show
          Hitch:They Must Praise Him, Urge Him To Run


     CHRISTOPHER KIDNAPPED
          -Clinton Urges Caution